My wonderful husband and his new venture

Sorry it's been a while. Life keeps moving and I barely have time to think about what is happening, let alone write about it.

Hard at work

New developments in the Kirkup household: Adam is now self-employed. We mentioned in the previous 'family' post that he handed in his notice a week before Christmas due to his company unexpectedly changing his role and shift patterns.

Adam began the search for full-time job search over the festive season. Such fun, obviously. It was almost exactly a year since he was last doing this. When we first moved to Chester in Jan/Feb 2014 he had applied for over 80 full-time positions in regular minimum wage admin/data entry posts. He also applied for higher earning jobs, retail jobs and some down right peculiar jobs. One of which involved bull semen. Moving on...

Adam has a degree in English and Creative Writing. His dissertation won an award for being the best in his year and he received a prize from a publisher. He did his final year of university with our new born baby waking us up every three hours. He is one of the most talented, generous and humble people I know. How was a girl meant to do anything other than fall hopelessly in love with him? (Oh and I forgot to mention he is a grade seven pianist, a tremendous guitar player and a singer).

Needless to say I'm his biggest fan. But that's not to say he's without fault. We have been married four years now - more about married life in another post.

Anyway, Adam began this same process in Jan 2015. Applying for some of the most boring, monotonous, talent-wasting vacancies I had even seen. It was devastating for me to watch. He was only doing it for us. Doing it so we could pay the rent, afford to eat and run a car. We got thinking about what the alternatives were and suddenly the self-employed option became more than a dream. Adam has often applied with actual excitement to be a copywriter, editor or content creator. And we just thought, why not give it a go? Adam booked himself on to a four day 'Exploring Enterprise Course'  with the Prince's Trust and began to formalise exactly what it was he would concentrate on. To start a business is time consuming, costly and risky. And it feels even riskier when you are responsible for two small people.

Amazingly whilst all this was happening I got talking to a lady in a coffee shop who works at the university here. I mentioned applying for a few things there but never hearing back. Turns out she had a vacancy in her department. I have now been in the role for two weeks. I work four days a week 8.00 - 4.30, which to me is just perfect. I am, annoyingly, a bit of a morning person and by finishing early I'm home for family dinner.This is the most I have ever worked, the biggest length of time spent away from my wee ones. I am feeling... I am feeling a lot of different things about it. A post on this coming soon.

So anyway, four weeks ago Adam (as Penfold Content - check him out!) landed his first paid job. Freelancing is not the most predictable of income sources. Once you do get the work there is then invoicing. Gone are the days of a set wage coming in at a scripted time. After invoicing someone for the glorious work you have laboured over they then have 30 days to pay. When you are just starting this can obviously result in cash flow problems and have fairly large consequences. Praise the Lord, we don't have any of these type of issues currently. My new four-day-a-week wage helps take the edge off a bit.

It is a little nerve-wracking starting a new business but it's has been a joy to watch Adam so motivated and creative in his new role. There will undoubtedly be times this year when I'm incredibly sad that we can't afford a holiday or any fancy clothes, but this is all normal for the first few years and I am in support of our new venture.

Sarah

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Has anyone gone self-employed recently? Or gone back to work with a shift pattern different to before?

Let us know in the comments below.

You can find Four for the Road on Twitter, Instagram and Pinterest, or you can connect with Sarah on Google+

The List: What I'm learning about being a stay-at-home dad

For the last two weeks (and for the next month at least) I have been home with the kids four days a week. Though I'm used to solo parenting, four consecutive days is a new experience for me. Here's what I'm learning:

• I am no longer allowed to shower
• Any visions of my toddler helping with laundry and sweeping, though cute, are total fantasy
• I will be unable to wear any of these clothes tomorrow
• I now have to comb and style my daughter's hair
• I do not know how to do any hairstyles appropriate for a five-year-old girl
• The other dads and male carers at toddler group would probably appreciate another guy to talk to, but are all just as nervous and socially awkward as I am
• Allow at least an additional 40 minutes to your parents' evening appointment time
• Nap times of less than one hour lead to feelings of resentment towards your child
• Nap times of over two hours lead to feelings of extreme and inexplicable guilt
• There must be after-school snacks
• Seriously, just make sure there are after-school snacks
• There aren't enough cups of tea in a day
• This was a terrible fortnight to try and give up sugar

Most importantly I'm learning to slow down. To switch off the business/blogging/housework/worrying part of my brain and just enjoy the moment with my little ones. Because when you're out in the sunshine, with The Chap licking mud off a trowel and The Bookworm spraying the laundry with a garden hose - you don't get those moments back.

Adam

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Any other guys adjusting to stay-at-home status? (Or do you prefer 'primary parent'?) How are you finding it?

Let us know in the comments below, or you can connect with Adam on Google+

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'The List' is a Linky run by two blogs: Mums' Days and You Baby Me Mummy. You can find out more here.

Spring Makeover

It's a beautiful day outside. The back door is wide open, a cool breeze is blowing through, birds are singing, and our little chap is about to wake up from his nap.

Just enough time to let you know that Four For The Road is having a bit of a spring makeover. Within the next couple of weeks fourfortheroad.co.uk will look all shiny and new. We'll still be blogging about our little ones, and family life in Chester in the North West, as well as something new. (Ooh, mysterious!)

We were thrilled to be included in BritMums' round-up of World Book Day blogs. You can check out our post here.

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Does it feel like spring where you are? Have you been out enjoying the sunshine (if you can remember what that is)? Let us know below.

You can connect with Adam on Google+

World Book Day is a dangerous thing

Tomorrow is World Book Day. There's already been a bit of a hoo-ha in the Guardian about parents who make their own costumes.

Well, World Book Day was a day early at our daughter's school and - I confess - I am that parent.

It all started when she was two. Her nursery at the time told us World Book Day was coming up, and I promptly forgot all about.

The day rolled around. We arrived, harassed, slightly late, breakfast crumbs around the mouth. We walked in to find every other child was a princess, a pirate, a caterpillar, a bear.

For the Book Day group photograph they cobbled together a kimono and hat for her to wear, but I won't forget the moment I dropped her off that day. The disappointment. The sad, questioning eyes. And I vowed, never again.

And I've done okay so far. We've had Super Daisy, Spiderman and now Betty O'Barley.

If you aren't familiar with Betty, she is the heroine of the Julia Donaldson and Axel Scheffler book The Scarecrow's Wedding.

How hard can it be? I thought. I'll just sew the straw onto the dress. These thoughts would come back to mock me as I sat on the floor in our lounge desperately trying to re-attach handfuls of straw at midnight, and then again as I manically hoovered the whole house (the whole house!) this morning.

Still, it's a small price to pay, right?

In honour of the event I composed the following poem. Apologies to Julia Donaldson for its quality.

Our house is all covered in straw,

From the bed to the living room door;

I cleaned for an hour

Then jumped in the shower

And discovered a little bit more.

Thanks,

Adam

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Have any of you made costumes for World Book Day this year? Got any parenting horror stories about costumes that didn't work, or times you forgot altogether?

Let us know in the comments below. Or you can connect with Adam on Google+

Why canal boats can be fun: Ellesmere Port Boat Museum with kids

"If you want to get soaked, go to the boat museum."

That became our eldest's motto during trips there in 2014. Not because we allowed them to fall into the canal, but because we chose rainy days for every visit. On one particularly torrential trip one of the shop assistants came out to the car with us, holding a big 'Canal & River Trust' umbrella over our heads.

But today the sun shone, and we were all looking forward to a rain-free day at the National Waterways Museum, Ellesmere Port. To set the scene, they've put together an introductory video...



It's safe to say that none of us is passionate about canals - the history, the construction, the boats, we can take them or leave them. But there are lots of things to like about the museum. Here are the top five things that we, and our two small kids, enjoyed today:

Porters Row Cottages

Easy to miss, these former canal workers' homes have been refurbished in period style (1850, 1900s, 1930s, 1940s) and are tucked away behind the main museum. The different styles, and strange items like mangles and washtubs, were enough to hold the attention of our daughter (age 5) for about three minutes.

The real draw of the Porter's Row Cottages is out through the back gates. Go out through the first couple of houses and you'll find an assortment of old-fashioned toys in the yard: quoits, skittles, spinning tops, wooden horses, and tin cans to knock down with bean bags (a clear winner today).

At the rear of another of the cottages is a veg garden. It had been a communal garden for the original residents and is now looked after by volunteers at the museum.

Power Hall

The Power Hall is a room full of engines. If you know about engines then the technical stuff might interest you. All I know is this: some of the engines are small, and some are big. More importantly some are whirring around constantly, and some go when you press the button.

Children don't need to debate the merits of diesel, or know the fundamentals of internal combustion. They know that if you press the button then the big, noisy, whirry engine will start to go, and it will be great fun. My kids love the Power Hall, solely because of the buttons.

Play Area

This is the main reason my kids like the museum. There is a big narrowboat made of soft play pieces, with barrels and boxes of goods to load aboard. They love taking it all apart and putting it back together, and diving off it head first. This bit is obviously in high demand on busy days.

Next to this there's a room for younger kids, which is usually quieter. There is a drawing table, foam building blocks, standard stuff really. The best bits are a tunnel and a big box of squishy balls.

Boats

There are, obviously, loads of boats. The ones I'm referring to are those than you can get inside.

There's one floating on the water that you can board, to have a look around the tiny sleeping and cooking area, and see the brightly painted panels. There's another inside the museum which you can walk the full length of.

They even do boat trips. We haven't been on one, but we saw one departing today and it appeared to be fairly popular.

The Views

I'm sure my kids weren't bothered, but the boat museum has a lot of fine views. Even in the car park you get an expansive vista of the River Mersey. Within the museum grounds you can see out across the Shropshire Union Canal and Manchester Ship Canal.

On a mild February day like today, with the bright sun shimmering across the canals and still a touch of wintery freshness in the air, watching the colourful boats bobbing in the water... It's almost enough to make you see the appeal of it all.

Adam ---

Anything we missed? Anywhere you'd like us to review? Let us know in the comments below.

You can connect with Adam on Google+

Come Slide with Me

Which are the best soft plays in Chester?

Hint - we've reviewed three (and a bit). Our Chester soft play reviews are below.

Soft play centres - when did these become a thing? My mum swears that we never had them as nippers. We were rolling around in open meadows, collecting pebbles on the beach or painting and sticking like Picasso. My mum also didn't drive, which I think is more the reason that my two siblings and I endured a soft vinyl, sensory room, disco cave deprivation.

There are now soft plays in abundance, in every city, town and village. They can be an absolute money-spinner and a winter life-saver. I have an almost-18-month-old boy and five-year-old girl, so something we can all do together is a total win. And something where the eldest can do a little parenting (while I have a sit) is even more welcome.

 A few things that annoy me about these colourful wonderlands though. I don't get why some charge for adults and babies (under one) - the rate for kids is usually quite pricey already. I only have two wee ones but I know friends with three and it mounts up fast.

Sometimes there is a lack of healthy food options. I know that they won't always be popular with the kids, but they are for a mum who already feels guilty about giving her kids Shreddies and biscuits that day.

I enjoy soft plays with a tannoy. Ones who police. Ones that remove the older children from the under-twos section, often with considerable levels of gusto and commitment. I'm aware that in coming years I may not delight in these ones so much, as it's very likely to be my son running amok on a ladybird ride-along, taking down toddlers on a whim.

The best ones also have real coffee machines. I'm not expecting 100% Arabica but come on, even caffeine addicts have standards.

The list below isn't comprehensive, but these are the ones we visit most often:

Funky Town

Funky Town, formerly known as Funky Monkey's, is walking distance from the city centre. It's not the biggest, but it's got everything you need. There's a padded sensory room, with its own colour-changing ball pool, projections and an illuminated bubble tube with fish in it. But not real fish. That would be irresponsible.

There's a disco room, with lights. There are party packages, including The Avengers and Frozen. We saw a particularly realistic Iron Man once.

They have multiple slides across three stories of soft play. There are those sucky tubes in the ball pit, which feed all of the balls into a big hopper that unloads on your head.

They have TV screens which show rolling BBC News coverage with subtitles, and their food selection is probably the best, and definitely the most varied, you can get: pasta, pizza, wraps, salads, even an 'English Breakfast' panini.

The toddler area has its own ball pit, padded slide and carousel.

Their pricing system is complicated, ranging up to £4.25 (£4.75 weekends and hols) for kids aged 5+.

Free Wi-Fi.

Also, major points for their Facebook page being so up-to-date.

Crazy Daisy's at the Ice Cream Farm

Ignoring for a moment the billion varieties of amazing ice cream, and also the farm animals, and the tractors, the soft play at the Ice Cream Farm is reason enough to go.

It is ice cream themed! There are cartoon cows everywhere (the eponymous Crazy Daisy). The big slide looks like melted strawberry and chocolate ice cream. It also has four lanes, which is brilliant if you want to race against your kids.

Crazy Daisy's also has sucky ball pit tubes. There is a cannon which shoots squidgy balls at ducks. There's a little enclosed football court, and they have magnetic locking gates making it more difficult (but by no means impossible) for your child to escape the larger soft play.

The toddler soft play is high class, and has its own ball pool and a zealously guarded entry gate. If you're over 90cm, you're not coming in.

The cafe sells jacket potatoes, sandwiches, reasonable coffee. You definitely can't bring your own food - just to make sure they've stuck up about 30 laminated posters saying so. But there is an outside picnic area for when the weather's nice.

£3 per child in the week, £3.50 at weekends. No charge for adults, or for younger kids using the toddler play area.

Free Wi-Fi.

Wizz Kidz

Wizz Kidz, in Saltney, is definitely the biggest soft play I've ever been to. I'm sure they have a full-sized five-a-side pitch inside, and their three storey soft play has a trampoline on one of its levels. And a massive slide.

There are separate baby and toddler areas, which is pretty unique. Apparently they've just got a new sensory room but I haven't been to see it. They also have a disco room.

Free entry up to 3pm on Monday & Thursday during term times.

Free Wi-Fi, and lots of comfy couches.

Topsy Tumbles

Adam insists that I include Topsy Tumbles (at Northgate Arena) even though it is totally not a soft play. They do have a bouncy castle, though, and lots of those Little Tikes cars, and balls. And it's £2.70 for one adult and child, with a free slice of toast.

Tuesday & Thursday mornings, 9:30 - 11:30.

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Thanks for reading. Let us know your thoughts and favourites below!

Sarah

How we got our 18-month-old to brush his teeth.

Our little chap got his first tooth at about three months old. Despite the screaming, sleepless nights and various minor ailments ("Oh, he has a runny nose? Must be teething"), he decided that he quite liked having a tooth and so produced a few more. By age one he had all but two of his gnashers, which have arrived subsequently.

They tell you - 'they' being health visitors, dentists, general well-meaning folk - that you need to start brushing your child's teeth as soon as they appear. Which is fine for them to say, because they're not the ones who need to put their hands near the mouth of your extremely toothy child.

Just look at those!

The chap never liked having his teeth brushed. We got him those round toothbrushes with the thumbhole in the middle. We got various toothbrushes printed with characters he was, at best, only vaguely familiar with. He did not like having the toothbrush in his mouth.

Like the good parents we are, we tried to forcibly brush his teeth for him. He proved to be surprisingly strong, and very stubborn.

We tried distraction. At one point there were three toothbrushes, two parents and one big sister involved. He was not to be fooled, and retaliated by developing a lizard-like ability to lock his teeth on any incoming object, whether it was a toothbrush or a finger.

We had pretty much reached the end of our resources of patience and ingenuity. We didn't particularly want all of his baby teeth to turn brown and rot away. Nor did we want to have a 15-minute 'Battle of the Bathroom Sink' every morning and evening, and risk further damage to our fingers.

Then Santa came.

Or, more accurately, we bought his big sister a Disney Princess electric toothbrush to go in her Christmas stocking. Since that fateful morning, December 25th, he has been absolutely obsessed with it. He even let us brush his teeth with it!

Obviously his sister wasn't best pleased at having to share her toothbrush with him, so this week we finally got around to buying him his very own Batman electric toothbrush. It cost £3 and it is worth every one of those 300 pennies. He doesn't have the first clue who Batman is, but he likes that you need to turn it on, and that it buzzes in his mouth while we brush his teeth.

Seems like Batman's been in the toothbrush game a while.

Thanks for reading,

Adam

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Anyone else had a similar experience? Or something their baby/toddler just refused to do, until you found an ingenious solution? Let us know in the comments below.

Please don't comment sharing a link to some article saying that electric toothbrushes are going to ruin our kids' teeth. I just couldn't handle it.


You can connect with Adam on Google+